Kathmandu, Nepal
November 20, 2013
This just in!
While votes are being counted to determine the winners and losers of this election, it was becoming imminent that the almighty Prachanda was not going to win the seat. In an unprecedented move, it has been confirmed that Prachanda has now declared himself the new King of Nepal.
Inspite of being a commoner till few years back, Prachanda has reached height of power in the tiny Kingdom of Nepal. Tagged as the "fierce one", noone dares to defy him for fear of personal harm, as the "fierce one" has over 17,000 deaths attributed to his last bloody revolution.
Speaking on National Television, Puspa Kamal Dahal, aka Prachanda, has made a declaration that Nepal will need to be ruled by King in order to make pathway into development. He said, "After having tested out the new form of democracy, we have witnessed that it does not work in Nepal because of poverty and illeteracy.". He added, "What Nepal needed was a change in the Royal Family. So hence on this 20th day of November, I declare myself the new King of Nepal, and heretofor my family is to be referred to as the Royal Family with full ordinance of hajur and Baksyosh administered upon any communication with the Royal family.
Observers including President Jimmy Carter have supported this declaration saying that Nepal is not ready for democracy.
Supporters have ordered a 50kilogram garland from Amazon.com 2 day delivery option, to put upon Prachanda to celebrate his ascension to the Nepal throne. This garland beats the old record of 20kg garland in the Guinness book of world record, yet another victorious moment for proud Nepalis to celebrate.
Ex King Gyanendra and his immediate family were not available for comment.
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