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 The Missing Cock
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Posted on 11-11-05 7:31 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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The priest in a small Irish village
loved the cock and ten hens
he kept in the hen house behind the church.

But one Saturday night
the cock went missing!

The priest knew that cock fights happened
in the village so he started to question his parishioners
in church the next morning.

During Mass, he asked the congregation,
"Has anybody got a cock?"

All the men stood up.

"No, no," he said, "that wasn't what I meant.
Has anybody seen a cock?"

All the women stood up.

"No, no," he said, "that wasn't what I meant.
Has anybody seen a cock that doesn't
belong to them?"

Half the women stood up.

"No, no," he said, "that wasn't what I meant.
Has anybody seen MY cock?"

All the nuns, three altar boys,
two priests and a goat stood up.


 
Posted on 11-11-05 7:47 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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hahahahah...hahahahah

Hushpuppy,,, cracking joke mate.. more please.. Here are a few of mines:
**************
Corporate Lesson #1

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings.
The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs.
When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor.
Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800 to drop that towel,
" After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her$800 and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks,
"Who was that?"
"It was Bob the next door neighbour," she replies. "Great!" the husband says, "did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?"


Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.
***********************
Corporate Lesson #2

A priest offered a lift to a Nun.
She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal aleg.
The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"
The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak."
Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way.

On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129.

It said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."

Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.
*********************
Corporate Lesson 3:

A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the
manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out.
The Genie says, "I'll give each of you just one wish." "Me first! Me first!" says the admin. clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world." ****!
She's gone.
"Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep.
"I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life." ****!
He's gone.
"OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager.


The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."
.
..
Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.
***********

Good ones eh! :)




 


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