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gazzab
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Posted on 11-11-05 10:41
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Hello Friends, I have been surfing Sajha for quite some time now. Inspired by Kurakani's various threads , I also decided to write one too...... Somewhere in the dark recess of my mind Something I find unable to express Same old pain,good'ol joy dupes me, conceals me of my existence... of my presence Disjointed jigsaws ... I try to gather Many pieces however ... I wish to bury Now and then,morbid soul searches for a saviour birds have flown,minds have digressed and rhythms have veered But the soul is still shy... Mind eclipses my soul,death eclipses my life... Hard to open eyes ....but once I blinked I already felt beneath six feet under... The clouds are heavy for quite sometime now... the sky is overcast ... it must rain now... The flowers are budding ... it must bloom now Now or never ... I must rise ... Like a phoenix. . .like a sunny day... after every ghastly night.
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snurp
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Posted on 11-12-05 11:55
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incognito_kanchi
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Posted on 11-12-05 5:25
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anonymous
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Posted on 11-12-05 6:16
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^ too writes...butn doesnt wanna show!!!!!!lobi!!!;oP ok ok if i got it wrong..i was misinformed :oS hehe... and gaazab ...woohoooo!!!I read u!!!!:oD....i did read!!duh!hehe...and well who knows u just might have inspired some others ;o)...so....share more ;o)..u just wont know wat u shared might mean smthing to another ;o)....thats wat i tell meself anyways when i post me bhakwash wahahaha :o| hehe..but seriously dude!!!share more!!!:oD...mero happy mood lai alik change gardio when i read here :o| hehe...but its all good ;o).... good day :oD...
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anonymous
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Posted on 11-12-05 6:39
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when did cigg started having hand!!!!duh!!!!!hehe...and if u wrote such things about a cigg...sheesh its gettn addicted!!DRUGS!!!not love!!DUH!;oP hehe..actually is love a drug?who knows?i dunno cos i dun believe in such bullcrap re kya...seriously!!!!im being serious here hehe... anyways GI :o|...only one!!!u posted only one!:@ dyam oh well better than nothing hehe...better share more hai!!!cos dyam u!!dun keep it to urself !!!and its just not me here ni ;o) hehe..dyam wat i just read did make me squirm :o| is that good or bad :o| hehe.. anyways dyam im late for FOOOTBALLL!!arghhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!GI nice to see u :oD...that thing applies to u hai..in case u were talkn about someone else re kya ;oP hehe..dun worry some ppl just cant seem to stop even when they shud :o| hehe... good day :oD
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gazzab
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Posted on 11-12-05 7:32
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Thank You GurL_Interrupted and anonymous for your comments. I tried to use metaphors for the feeeling inside me. GurL_Interrupted..u'r poem is nice n cute,not depressing as mine. keep it up n post more.Gurl,you are using cigerette as a post-metaphor which i guess can be used as other being too.
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gazzab
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Posted on 11-15-05 10:57
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Hi frens..... HEre's my second poem in "DIRGE & RISE " series KAFKAESQUE FANTASIES Dreams?...Grotesque...... feelings......wary binded by webs?...webs of despondency Touch?...subtle?... eyes?...red blinded by memories?...memories of misery Hopes?...drifting?? reconciliation?...impossible surrounded by darkness?...darkness so melancholy Prayers??unheeded?? god??illusory guided by beliefs??beliefs so jaundiced Life.?..precarious?? death?..inevitable stalled by sanity?sanity so flimsy
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DC_Girl
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Posted on 11-17-05 10:07
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hey Gazzab, nice poem! very touching. keep them coming..after a long time, had a good poetry read :) Hard to open eyes ....but once I blinked I already felt beneath six feet under... The clouds are heavy for quite sometime now... the sky is overcast ... it must rain now... The flowers are budding ... it must bloom now Now or never ... I must rise ... Like a phoenix. . .like a sunny day... after every ghastly night. an urge to break free. stunning imagery. Girl_I, i've always gotten the image of you as a beautiful, rebellious woman shadowed by sadness :) don't knwo why, but so so.. and your poem is also beautifully sad :) She had loved him so passionately - more than Nero's decadence for the rose petals he once used for the dead. Couldn't have said it better!
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gazzab
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Posted on 11-18-05 12:54
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GurL_Interrupted and DC_Girl . Thank you for your comments. I'll post my poem shortly. Hats off to Gurl_interrupted for such beautiful words. Simple words and it's non-meandering flow adds lustre to your poems. Keep it up. I wish I could do that.. She had loved him so passionately - more than Nero's decadence for the rose petals he once used for the dead what a vivid depiction......your words simply brings out the subtle picture.... To him, her heavy heart was just a plain empty blackboard with no colorful crayons to paint his life. Myself being a fan of metaphors, I liked it's use here. As for your next poem "Her Eyes" which is more like a stand-still unlike your other poems which are flowing. It's very hard to end these type of poems.I liked the way you did. Keep on posting ...... ------------------------------------------------ Ya , the question mark bothers me. I didn't put it intentionally....so i'm rewriting it without any glitches... KAFKAESQUE FANTASIES Dreams......Grotesque...... feelings......wary binded by webs......webs of despondency Touch...subtle...... eyes......red blinded by memories......memories of misery Hopes.......drifting reconciliation.......impossible surrounded by darkness......darkness so melancholy Prayers......unheeded god......illusory guided by beliefs......beliefs so jaundiced Life......precarious death......inevitable mired by sanity......sanity so flimsy
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gazzab
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Posted on 11-18-05 1:47
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Here's my third poem in " DIRGE AND RISE " series.....I would love to find some comments and critiques Never felt so cold before Never found myself so lost The furthur I tried to fly the closer you came to clip my wings forgive me..let me fly with these weak wings let me live with my loneliness the trust shared... was shattered a long time ago what's the point in believing again I've been morbid for a long time don't come to lift my spirits now the soul is weak,the flesh is sore somewhere in the horizon...I look for light even though I know, it's already been darkened let me live in the tumultous past don't show me the dreams of tommorrow time and again, I know I won't survive I'll be better dead,don't try to make me alive ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- GurL_Interrupted , waiting for your critique n comments.
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gazzab
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Posted on 11-18-05 4:15
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Thank you GurL_Interrupted for your comments . I guess critique comes with negative points too :-). anyway, thanks for the good comments. Waiting for your poem.......
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gazzab
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Posted on 11-19-05 2:50
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"Yes, there is a Nirvanah; it is leading your sheep to a green pasture, and in putting your child to sleep, and in writing the last line of your poem." ---------------------------------Kahlil Gibran (1883 - 1931) Truly said. Here's my 4th poem in "Dirgr and Rise" Series Twisted............ memories....feelings.......dreams...... the sky outside...... the pain inside........ lights.....forms........stars.... past......present..... future...... twisted is my life twisted am I
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gazzab
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Posted on 12-01-05 11:15
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Part of me?. Always try to break free Part of me ? Try to hide it from me Some times I feel I was a vagabond Swim with the fish in a dirty pond marauding along the way convincing inner soul lying the untold lie patching up the hole
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