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 Will
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Posted on 04-16-06 2:25 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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I am writing this Will to let you all know that you're all muthafking bas*ards. Wake up, fkers...everything around you is fake. You’re all just a bunch of cowards waiting to die. And I do hope that you all die. And rot in hell. Fk you all. Fk every single one of you. I bet you're here today to find out if I left anything for you. You can all burn in hell. I hated being alive...and living amongst you fkers. You made my life hell. And now that I’m dead, I’m gonna make your life hell. I’m gonna fk everyone up. all right, this is a Will. So lets get to the point. Basically, I want to leave everything that I own to my housemaid, Maria. I don't even know Maria’s last name. But she was a great housemaid. She doesn't speak a single word of English so you're gonna have to tell her about my Will in Spanish. She loved my house...she took care of it all her life...so she's gonna like living there. And to my spoilt, biotchy children, you little pieces of shit...go drown yourselves. I never had the chance to tell you this (because I was your mother), but I hated you all. From the bottom of my heart, I despised you bastards. I bet you're sitting there with your gaping jaws, just staring at the fking priest who's reading this shit. Well, keep staring. 'cause you ain't gonna get a single penny. You spoilt bas*ards. And to the person who fathered you biotches, I’m gonna come get you. Hell, it's confession time...so, I tried to kill you once. Remember the time you couldn't find your fking inhaler? Well, I hid it. Yeah yeah, I wasn't the most creative person back then. But, you know, I couldn't help but burst out laughing when you started gasping for breath...holding your head for some reason. i never really understood why you were holding your head. I always thought you were one strange muthafka. Always correcting my grammar and making me feel like i wasn't worth a shit. Well fkyou fker you ain't got nothing on me now. Enough about you. And to my mother, the seventeen years that I lived with you were_________...i don't know the word to use here. I was a completely different person back then. You wouldn't even have recognized me if you had seen me after you left. Well, thank god you didn't decide to come back as a ghost or something. It wasn't your fault. You raised me well. But this world fked me up after you left. And so I basically turned into a biotchh (in ludacris' words). And by the way, I know you always wanted grandchildren...but believe me you're better off not knowing these fkers. Seriously, they are little monsters. They are Satan’s children. I tried to drown them once but they started laughing like they were enjoying it or something...like it was a game. Dumbasses. Well, I wish I could see you again. But, I’m going to hell and you're probably in heaven...so that's not gonna happen. And to my dear father,...oh fk, I don't remember anything about him. is he still alive? If he is, well give him my house in Fayteville. He always liked that town...or not. I don't know. Okay, this is getting really really really long and the fking priest who's reading this is probably tired. Now, i wound't want to make a priest tired, would I? So I will stop. But before I do so, I would like to be remembered as the person who didn't fit in with you muthafkas...just 'cause you're all dumbasses...and have no clue what life is about. All right, I shall jump off this building now. So long, muthafkas.
 


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