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PunteDamai
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 Proud To Be A Nepali
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Posted on 08-30-07 8:17 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Time: Year: 2050 Place: Two Americans at IBM, USA. Conversation of two
Americans pre recorded to know the future Currency Conversion Rate: NRs. 1/- = US$ 100/-. Note: Please be prepared for this in 2050 as it is very unusual for us at this time but its FUTURE of Nepal.
Alex : Hi John, you didn't come yesterday to office?
John : Yeah, I was in Nepalese Embassy for stamping.
Alex: Oh really, what happened, I heard that strict.
John : Yeah, but I managed to get it.
Alex : How long it took to get it stamped?
John : Oh, it was nasty man, long queue. Bill Gates was standing infront of me and they played with him like anything. Thats why it got delayed. I went there at 2 am itself and waited and returned by 4 pm. Alex : Really? In Nepal, it is a matter of an hour to get stamped for USA.
John : Yeah, but that is because who in Nepal will be interested in coming to USA man, their economy has been booming.
Alex : So, when are you leaving?
John : Anytime, after receiving my tickets from the client in Nepal and you know, I will be getting a chance to fly Royal Nepal Airlines. Sort of dream come true.
Alex : How long are you going to stay in Nepal.John : What do you mean by how long. I will be settled in Nepal, my company has promised me that they will process my Hariyo Patra.
Alex : Really,
lucky person man, it is very difficult to get a Hariyo Patra in Nepal. John : Yeah, thats why, I am planning to marry a Nepali girl there. Alex : But you can find lots of US girls in Kathmandu, Pokhara and Biratnagar.
John : But, I prefer Nepali girls because they are beautiful and cultured.
Alex : Where did you get the offer, Kath?
John : Yeah, salary is good there, but cost of living is quite high, it is Rs. 1000/- for a single room accommodation.
Alex : I see, that's too much for US people, Rs. 1/- = $ 100/-. Oh God! What about in Pok, Birat?
John : No idea, but it is less than what we have in Kath. It is like the world headquarters of Software.
Alex : I heard, almost all the Nepalese are having one personal Robot for help.
John : You can get a BMW car for Rs. 5000/-, and a personal Robot for less than Rs. 7500/-. But my dream is to purchase Sherpa, which costs Rs.200000/-.
Alex : By the way, who is your client?
John : Upadhaya and Sharma Associates, a pure Nepalese company, specializing in Embedded Software.
Alex : Oh, really, lucky to work in a pure Nepalese company. They are really intelligent and unlike American Bodyshoppers who have opened their Fly-by-night outfits in Nepal. Nepalese companies pay you in full even when you are on bench. My friend Paul Allen, it seems, used his bench time to visit Birgunj, the most livable place in Nepal, probably world. There you have full freedom and no restrictions. They have one of the world's biggest dry port you see. You can do whatever you want! I wonder how that state has perfected that system.
John : Yeah man, you are right. I hope our America also follows their footsteps.
Alex :How are you going to cope with their language?
John : Why not? From my school days I have been learning Nepali as my first language here at New York. At the Consulate they tested my proficiency in Nepali and were quite impressed by my cent percent score in TONIL i.e.Test of Nepali as International Language.
Alex : So, you are going to have fun there.
John : Yeah, I will be travelling in the world's fastest train, world's largest theme park, and the famous Kollywood where you can see actors like, Rajesh Hamal, and all. Funworld is also in Kollywood.
Alex : You know, the PM is scheduled to visit US next year, he may then relax the number of visas.
John : That's true. Last month, Rajib Rajbhandari visited White House and donated Rs. 2000/- for infrastructure development at Silicon Valley and has promised more if we follow the model of High-Tech City of Kathmandu. Bill Gates also got a chance of meeting him. Very lucky person.
Alex : But, Nepalese government is planning to split Mercantile's Neposys.
John : He is a hard worker man, he can build any number of Neposys like this. Every
minute he is getting Rs. 1000/-. It seems, if you keep all his money
converted as Rs. 100/- notes you can reach Pluto.
Alex : OK, Good Luck John.
John : Same to you Alex. And don't go to Consulate in a Daura Suruwal because they will think you are too Nepalised and may doubt you will ever come back and hence your Non-Immigrant Visa may get rejected. But don't forget to say "Namaste, Tapain kasto hunuhunchha" to the Visa officer at Window 95. It seems he likes that and will not give you a visa if You don't greet him that way.

Hope you have enjoyed it...
 
Posted on 08-30-07 11:41 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Posted on 08-30-07 1:08 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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hahah very funny
 
Posted on 08-30-07 2:40 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Very funny Punte.
 
Posted on 08-30-07 2:43 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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A very witty piece ... enjoyed it.

:)
 
Posted on 08-30-07 2:56 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Posted on 08-30-07 3:21 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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little modified version of what I got in forwarded email few years back.

thanks again for posting.
 
Posted on 08-30-07 3:28 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Sardar Ji Jokes

1- Sardar ji is buying a TV
"Do you have color TVs?"
"Sure."
"Give me a green one, please."

2- Sardar Ji calls Air India.
"How long does it take to fly to Amritsar?"
"Just a sec," says the rep.
Thank you." says the Sardar ji and hangs up.

3- Sardar ji is filling up a job application
He promptly fills in the lines on NAME, AGE, ADDRESS, etc.
Then came the column SALARY EXPECTED
After much thought he writes: Yes

4- Sardarji goes into a store and sees a shiny object.
He asks the clerk, "What is that shiny object?"
The clerk replies, "That is a Thermos flask."
The Sardar asks, "What does it do?"
The clerk responds, "Keeps hot things hot and cold things cold."
The Sardar says, "I'll take it!"
The next day, he walks into work with his new Thermos.
His Sardar boss sees him and asks, "What is that shiny object with you?"
He said, "It's a Thermos flask."
The boss asks, "What does it do?"
He replies, "Keeps hot things hot and cold things cold."
The boss said, "Wow, what do you have in it?"
The Sardar replies, "Two cups of coffee and a coke."

5- Sardarji fixed an answering machine at home.
Two days later he disconnected it because he was getting complaints
like "Saala phone utha ke bolta hai ghar pe nahin hai."

6- What does Sardarji do after taking photocopies?
He compares it with the original for spelling mistakes.

7- What does Sardarji do when he has one white sheet and wants an extra
sheet?
He makes a photocopy of the white sheet.

8- There was a meeting of all the Surd freedom fighters.
They were planning for a free Punjab. Santa Singh raised a point,
"Oh...we'll take Punjab from India but how would we develop it?"
That was a tough one indeed. Banta Singh had a brainwave...
"No problem! We'll attack Amrika, it would take over us and then
we would become a State of USA and develop automatically."
All the surds became happy with this very simple solution but an old surd
was not. Someone asked him why he wasn't happy.
The old surd replied, "THAT'S ALL VERY WELL...WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF BY CHANCE
WE TOOK OVER AMRIKA???"

9- Sardarji went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain.
"I would like to buy this small TV," he told the salesman.
"Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," he replied.
He hurried home removed his turban and changed his hair style, and returned
to tell the salesman
"I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," Salesman replied.
"Damn, he recognised me," he thought.
He went for a complete disguise this time, haircut, new hair colour,
new outfit, big sunglasses, waited a few days, saw the salesman again.
"I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," he replied.
Frustrated, he exclaimed, "How do you know I'm a Sardar?"
"Because that's a microwave," he replied.

10- Why did 18 Sardars go to a movie?
Because below 18 was not allowed.

11- How do you measure Sardarji's intelligence?
Stick a tire pressure gauge in his ear

12- Sardarji proposes to a woman. She says yes if you bring me a pair of crocodile boots. He sets off to Africa and disappears. Finally a search is being made, they find him hunting crocodiles and watch him killing a huge one. He walks over the reptile, checks its legs and angrily exclaims "71st and *again* barefoot!"

13- What do you do when a Sardar throws a hand grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

14- What do you do when a Sardar throws a pin at you? Run like crazy....he's got a hand grenade in his mouth.

15- How do you make a Sardar laugh on Saturday? Tell him a joke on Wednesday.

16- What is the Sardar doing when he holds his hands tightly over his ears? Trying to hold on to a thought.

17- Why do Sardars work seven days a week? So you don't have to re-train them on Monday.

18- Why can't Sardars make ice cubes? They always forget the recipe.

19- How did the Sardar try to kill the bird? He threw it off a cliff.

20- What do you call 10 Sardars standing ear to ear? A wind tunnel.



Source:muskurahat.com

Hope you guys will enjoy.

One for each joke.
 


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