Spark

Speech given at the orientation program for the
new batch of MBA students

Symbiosis, Pune, July 24, 2008

© Chetan Bhagat

Good Morning everyone and thank you for giving me
this chance to speak to you. This day is about you. You, who have come to this
college, leaving the comfort of your homes (or in some cases discomfort), to become
something in your life. I am sure you are excited. There are few days in human
life when one is truly elated.  The first day in college is one of them.
 When you were getting ready today, you felt a tingling in your stomach.
What would the auditorium be like, what would the teachers be like, who are my
new classmates – there is so much to be curious about. I call this excitement,
the spark within you that makes you feel truly alive today. Today I am going to
talk about keeping the spark shining. Or to put it another way, how to
be happy most, if not all the time.

Where do these sparks start? I think we are born
with them. My 3-year old twin boys have a million sparks. A little Spiderman
toy can make them jump on the bed. They get thrills from creaky swings in the
park. A story from daddy gets them excited. They do a daily countdown for
birthday party – several months in advance – just for the day they will cut
their own birthday cake.

I see students like you, and I still see some
sparks. But when I see older people, the spark is difficult to find. That means
as we age, the spark fades. People whose spark has faded too much are dull,
dejected, aimless and bitter. Remember Kareena in the first half of Jab We Met
vs the second half? That is what happens when the spark is lost.   So how
to save the spark?

Imagine the spark to be a lamp’s flame. The first
aspect is nurturing – to give your spark the fuel, continuously. The second is
to guard against storms.

To nurture, always have goals. It
is human nature to strive, improve and achieve full potential. In fact, that is
success. It is what is possible for you. It isn’t any external measure – a
certain cost to company pay package, a particular car or house.

Most of us are from middle class families. To us,
having material landmarks is success and rightly so. When you have grown up
where money constraints force everyday choices, financial freedom is a big
achievement. But it isn’t the purpose of life. If that was the case, Mr. Ambani
would not show up for work. Shah Rukh Khan would stay at home and not dance
anymore. Steve Jobs won’t be working hard to make a better iPhone, as he sold
Pixar for billions of dollars already. Why do they do it? What makes them come
to work everyday? They do it because it makes them happy. They do it because it
makes them feel alive Just getting better from current levels feels
good. If you study hard, you can improve your rank. If you make an
effort to interact with people, you will do better in interviews. If you
practice, your cricket will get better. You may also know that you cannot
become Tendulkar, yet. But you can get to the next level. Striving for that
next level is important.

Nature designed with a random set of genes and
circumstances in which we were born. To be happy, we have to accept it and make
the most of nature’s design. Are you? Goals will help you do that. I must add,
don’t just have career or academic goals. Set goals to give you a balanced,
successful life. I use the word balanced before successful. Balanced
means ensuring your health, relationships, mental peace are all in good order.

There is no point of getting a promotion on the
day of your breakup. There is no fun in driving a car if your back hurts.
Shopping is not enjoyable if your mind is full of tensions.

You must have read some quotes – Life is a tough
race, it is a marathon or whatever. No, from what I have seen so far, life is
one of those races in nursery school, where you have to run with a marble in a
spoon kept in your mouth. If the marble falls, there is no point coming first.
Same with life, where health and relationships are the marble.
Your striving is only worth it if there is harmony in your life. Else, you may
achieve the success, but this spark, this feeling of being excited and alive, will
start to die.

One last thing about nurturing the spark – don’t
take life seriously. One of my yoga teachers used to make students laugh during
classes. One student asked him if these jokes would take away something from
the yoga practice. The teacher said – don’t be serious, be sincere. This quote
has defined my work ever since. Whether its my writing, my job, my
relationships or any of my goals. I get thousands of opinions on my writing
everyday. There is heaps of praise, there is intense criticism. If I take it
all seriously, how will I write? Or rather, how will I live? Life is
not to be taken seriously, as we are really temporary here. We are
like a pre-paid card with limited validity. If we are lucky, we may last
another 50 years. And 50 years is just 2,500 weekends. Do we really need to get
so worked up? It’s ok, bunk a few classes, goof up a few interviews, fall in
love. We are people, not programmed devices.

I’ve told you three things – reasonable goals,
balance and not taking it too seriously that will nurture the spark. However,
there are four storms in life that will threaten to completely put out the
flame. These must be guarded against. These are disappointment, frustration,
unfairness and loneliness of purpose.

Disappointment will come when
your effort does not give you the expected return. If things don’t go as
planned or if you face failure. Failure is extremely difficult to handle, but
those that do come out stronger. What did this failure teach me? is the
question you will need to ask. You will feel miserable. You will want to quit,
like I wanted to when nine publishers rejected my first book. Some IITians kill
themselves over low grades – how silly is that? But that is how much failure
can hurt you. But it’s life. If challenges could always be overcome, they would
cease to be a challenge. And remember – if you are failing at something, that
means you are at your limit or potential. And that’s where you want to be.

Disappointment’ s cousin is  Frustration,
the second storm.  Have you ever been frustrated? It happens when things
are stuck. This is especially relevant in India. From traffic jams to getting
that job you deserve, sometimes things take so long that you don’t know if you
chose the right goal. After books, I set the goal of writing for Bollywood, as
I thought they needed writers. I am called extremely lucky, but it took me five
years to get close to  a release. Frustration saps excitement, and turns
your initial energy into something negative, making you a bitter person. How
did I deal with it? A realistic assessment of the time involved – movies take a
long time to make even though they are watched quickly, seeking a certain
enjoyment in the process rather than the end result – at least I was learning
how to write scripts, having a side plan – I had my third book to write and
even something as simple as pleasurable distractions in your life – friends,
food, travel can help you overcome it. Remember, nothing is to be taken
seriously. Frustration is a sign somewhere, you took it too seriously.

Unfairness – this is hardest to
deal with, but unfortunately that is how our country works. People with
connections, rich dads, beautiful faces, pedigree find it easier to make it –
not just in Bollywood, but everywhere. And sometimes it is just plain luck.
There are so few opportunities in India, so many stars need to be aligned for
you to make it happen. Merit and hard work is not always linked to achievement
in the short term, but the long term correlation is high, and
ultimately things do work out. But realize, there will be some
people luckier than you. In fact, to have an opportunity to go to college and
understand this speech in English means you are pretty damm lucky by Indian
standards. Let’s be grateful for what we have and get the strength to
accept what we don’t. I have so much love from my readers that other
writers cannot even imagine it. However, I don’t get literary praise. It’s ok.
I don’t look like Aishwarya Rai, but I have two boys who I think are more
beautiful than her. It’s ok. Don’t let unfairness kill your spark.

Finally, the last point that can kill your spark
is Isolation. As you grow older you will realize you are
unique. When you are little, all kids want Ice cream and Spiderman. As you grow
older to college, you still are a lot like your friends. But ten years later
and you realize you are unique. What you want, what you believe in, what makes
you feel, may be different from even the people closest to you. This can create
conflict as your goals may not match with others. And you may drop some of
them. Basketball captains in college invariably stop playing basketball by the
time they have their second child. They give up something that meant so much to
them. They do it for their family. But in doing that, the spark dies. Never,
ever make that compromise. Love yourself first, and then others.

There you go. I’ve told you the four
thunderstorms – disappointment, frustration, unfairness and isolation. You
cannot avoid them, as like the monsoon they will come into your life at regular
intervals. You just need to keep the raincoat handy to not let the spark die.

I welcome you again to the most wonderful
 years of your life. If someone gave me the choice to go back in time, I
will surely choose college. But I also hope that ten years later as well, your
eyes will shine the same way as they do today. That you will Keep the Spark
alive, not only through college, but through the next 2,500 weekends. And I
hope not just you, but my whole country will keep that spark alive, as we really
need it now more than any moment in history. And there is something cool about
saying – I come from the land of a billion sparks.